Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Confidence

Hey EVERYBODY!
I wanted to take a minute and talk to U about confidence.
I use to have such confidence in myself in nearly everything I did. I still have confidence in somethings but others are tested on a daily basis. I use to be so on top of things and now I seem to question everything over and over again. I never had to question myself as to nearly everything I want to do. I have to think t

hings over or I will pay and I pay dearly. I have to think about things that I never use to think about before. I do get frustrated that I have to consider how much I will pay IF I do a lot of cleaning for the day. I use to be able to just go go go and now IF I do that I am paying dearly for it. This has affected MY confidence in myself greatly. I get mad and do things because I hate telling myself I can't. I have days I do NOT allow myself to do things and then I beat myself up with guilt.
I miss the Cindy I use to know. I NOW live with the fog and I really get bummed that MY memory is affected. I do NOT like that I do NOT remember things when I need to. I do NOT like I have no clarity at times. I do NOT like I have to recheck things just to make sure I turned it on or turned it off. This has knocked my confidence in myself tremendously. The questioning myself on everything is very tiresome. I really do NOT like being asked to do something because I have to think about IF I can. I have the problem that sometimes I just say yes because I hate having to think about how I am. Problem is I pay for some of those days I say yes.
Living with Fibromyalgia is a constant beating of MY confidence in myself.

Can U relate?
♥ Cindy

1 comment:

  1. Have just found your site via a pin on Pinterest. I love the image of looking at fibro in colors relating to pain areas. It makes so much sense to those of us who suffer. I want to say I totally relate to your post. I feel so badly when I have to say I can't watch my grandson or I can't do something with my kids or husband because I am miserable. There are days I can barely get out of bed let alone actually "do" something. I also am guilty on the days I do feel better to over-do and suffer later. Life is never easy when you have fibromyalgia. I was diagnosed in 1995 so you'd think I'd know the condition inside and out but still I get tripped up just trying to live my life. Thanks again for your wonderful blog.
    Gentle hugz

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